Ah! Akanemegamisama!
by Dorin
Summary: Being a teenager is hard. Being a teenage kami is even harder. Forcing two hotheaded teens to stay together is a task not even the gods want to handle. Can those two really get along?::AU blend of Ah! Megamisama! elements.


**Disclaimer: **Ranma 1/2 is the brainchild of Rumiko Takahashi, and copyright of Vis Media. Ah! Megamisama is also not my work, and I don't remember off the top of my head who made it. Any mention of other works are likewise the property of their respective creators and license holders, used here with only entertainment value in mind.

**Foreword:** This is another idea I had floating around in my head, and is a complete A/U work, with elements of the Ah! My Goddess series thrown in, altered to suit my specific needs. This will be the Ranma 1/2 universe with a new angle. How it works from there, is beyond my knowing at this time. I just hope you guys enjoy the idea.

Prologue

"I'm going out for a bit Ranma, business to take care of. There's money on the counter, order out for pizza. And this time save me a slice!" Genma roared once at his son before letting the door close with an audible click. He made a big production of his departure, as if he wanted his child to know the house was empty. Didn't see what it mattered, it was nothing new for the boy to be alone, seemed like half his life had been spent in the company of himself alone. With a shrug, he just went back to his manga, the only pastime he enjoyed apart from martial arts.

The portly martial artist slipped away from his small building, a three-story affair that was barely large enough to house its occupants comfortably; the ground floor given to the small dojo and printing business, the second floor the main living quarters, and the third storage. The second floor had a stairwell in the back, which lead down to a small section that was walled off, before opening up into the alley. It was this path he took now, so as to be visible in case his son spied on him. By now, Genma was just being paranoid, but appearances had to be maintained.

With a bang, the solid metal gate that kept the stairwell private automatically locked behind him, and confirmed he was on his way. Out the alley, and down the street two blocks before he felt safe. His eyes cast about suspiciously, making sure the sidewalk was mostly devoid of life before he stepped to the corner pay phone and fiddled in his gi for a moment, producing a card.

Without bothering to put in change, he dialed the number listed on the small slip of paper, and then waited for it to connect. Four rings, and the other end opened.

"Yes. Everything is all set on this end I'll be there in just a moment. Is it all set on your end?…Good. Then I'll see you in just a second." And with that the receiver returned to its cradle. Grinning, the Saotome patriarch slipped into a narrow side street, casting his eyes around once again to make sure he wasn't watched. Producing a very odd looking key, he slipped it into the lock of a shop door, giving it a twist.

The tumblers spun and the lock came undone, or at least a 'lock' came undone. The door itself didn't respond directly, but took on a pale white glow, as if someone had stepped into the Matrix. With a grin on his face, Genma took a moment to put himself in order, and turned the nob, with a push he vanished into a wall of light. Which was interesting, as the door itself was supposed to swing out, not in. And darkened shops weren't prone to producing solar quality light shows. The fat man passed through and shut the door behind him, the lights vanishing, and no one the wiser to his use of its services.

- - - - - 

His father's departure had been of no concern to the young man, and he didn't really look up from the manga for at least two hours. His stomach and tired eyes being the only things that could get him to break off. This was the latest issue, and it was hilarious, he just couldn't put it down. Every page was a riot, and it took several minutes of rolling on the floor in uncontrollable laughter to reign himself in. A lifetime of such behavior had made his lungs and ribs most resistant to the pain of prolonged spurts of hard guffawing.

Deciding a break was good, he rubbed his eyes a little and forced himself to blink several times to moisten them. Too much reading tended to dry them out. While taking a pause in his personal amusement he began deciding on what to order out. Not that he was averse to pizza, but he was the one who had to do the calling, so he should be the one to pick, not his old man. The goof probably would be out all night drinking, wobble himself in right at dawn, then sleep all day. It was the usual habit for Genma.

Sure, the dojo did fairly well, but not because one Saotome Genma was the owner and part time teacher. It was the fact the Saotome Dojo tended to attract an interesting array of itinerant practitioners of the fighting arts. Both teachers and students alike passed through this place going one way or the other. Thus, by being a sort of training pit stop, they gained attention in the fighting world.

Many of the best fighters from three continents had come through the doors at one point or another, drawn by the promise of meeting legends in various fields, and thereby sharpening their skills. Of course, Genma was a fair teacher, and helped people sharpen their skills to incredible degrees, if they could survive his hair brained training methods at least. He had a penchant to think up regiments that most people would label as cruel and unusual punishment, but there was no denying the results of his…odd, methods.

And to his credit, Genma was actually a fair writer when it came to martial arts. The other way the dojo made its money came from the various articles, manuals, and videos that the dojo put together and sold. "Saotome's Tips," a collection of Genma's critiques on various fighting styles and situations, was a hot item in the fighting community, for some weird reason. And the books on various odd martial arts always managed to find a dedicated audience, expanding their practice into other countries. Somehow his old man knew exactly how to bring out what interested people. Who knew that "Saotome's Spotlight: Underwater Martial Arts Basket Weaving" would sell ten thousand copies in only one year of publication?

They did alright, they'd never be wealthy, but they got by with enough to spare. Of course, most of their living expenses were completely alleviated by the handsome trust-fund his mother had allowed. His parents were separated, had been for an extremely long time, as long as Ranma could remember, but his mother went out of her way to see they were taken care of, even if she never visited, and Ranma only saw her every six months. They had a good relationship, regardless of distance.

Well, anyway, to the immediate problem of his stomach. He was thinking Chinese, but a pizza was really starting to sound good. A couple from the States had brought the art of American pizza with them to Japan, and there was no denying how good it was. The thought of a triple extra-cheese, three meat, pineapple special made his stomach rumble. Oh yeah, they were doing pizza tonight.

Ranma knew the number by heart, and picked up the phone to dial.

- - - - - 

Tendo Akane was not having a good day at all. She was stuck with operator duty all over a silly misunderstanding. It just galled her they would pull her away from her real job and stick her with phone duty all over one little mistake. She huffed and crossed her arms over her chest, eyes boring into the phone before her, as if daring it to ring. Actually, wishing it would because then she could at least do something interesting, and maybe if she did this job well they'd shorten her probation slightly and let her get back to work.

Honestly, this was so stupid. Her job was intense and demanded swift action when under fire. It wasn't like she intentionally tried to cause a problem she just got a little overzealous. She was still learning the ropes of her trade, could she be blamed for underestimating her own strength and throwing a little too much oomph behind her attacks?

Demon hunting was a serious business, and it required a lot of her. She'd only gotten her license a year prior, and they'd put her on small duty for much of that time. Her first real assignment, and she gets punished for a job well done. So maybe there was the issue of that little earthquake…in the middle of downtown Chicago, but it could have happened to anyone! Of course, she had come extremely close to exposure, and that always brought up a lot of bureaucratic problems with the Cleaners.

There was the matter of those four innocent mortals she'd pounded on a little too hard and sent to intensive care at the local hospital. But in her defense, they'd tried to grope her first! And how was she supposed to know mortal males were so weak? Was that enough to justify sticking here at a desk job for a month?

Well, she had been a little 'liberal' with her use of magic, but she had to get the job done! It still wasn't…oh, who was she kidding. There were at least a dozen serious problems the Hunter Council had put under review from her mission report. And for her first solo run against a serious enemy, she had set a record in the number of infractions and general no-no's. So, maybe a little cool down time was in order.

But she'd killed the demon!

Sticking her on Goddess Relief Operator duty was just wrong! This was Kasumi's job, not hers. Maybe her sister hadn't had a break in months, but that was her choice. There were tons of other people, infinitely more qualified, meaning patient and tactful, for the job. If Kasumi wanted a break, she could have any of a hundred people willing and able to jump in and take over the job for a few days.

Within the commercial services area, this was a posh job that held the chance for a wide range of transfers if done well. And no one did it better than Kasumi, who had held the job down from the age of nine, without evening having a license! She was just that good.

Oh well, if she could show them her skill here, then she would be back on Hunter duty pronto! And who knew, if she could fill in well for Kasumi, they might even give let her take off the seals so she could work her First Class powers again, and promote her to Unlimited license in the pursuit of her job! Then she could really show them what she was made of!

Now if the phone would only ring!

- - - - - 

In a pocket dimension, a place outside the normal boundaries of time and space, two men sat before a shogi board, sipping sake and taking turns at the game, while looking at a floating sphere before them. It was divided between two images, one of a young Saotome Ranma as he lounged in his living room, and the other of Tendo Akane staring at an old rotary phone done in elegant ivory and gold work. Within moments, their lifelong plans would come to fruition, and the two were all too eager to have it come about.

"Ah, Tendo-kun, this was the most brilliant plan we've ever had!" Genma grinned, tilting back his head and draining several long gulps of the fine brew made from somewhere other than Japan. He had to admit they sure knew how to make it in Heaven, 'nectar of the gods' indeed!

"Right you are Saotome-kun! Our children joined hand in hand, two family lines joined for all time. We'll go down in history as the great fathers who trained the finest demon hunters in history! They'll lavish us with praise, and our retirements will be assured!" One Tendo Soun grinned and tilted back his own flask, which prompted Genma to swiftly rearrange a few tiles on the board.

The two could not be more opposite. Genma was rather stumpy, and round. He could never get any good growth of facial hair, and his head was nothing more than a bald dome that would look good on a monk. His eyes were getting bad, and he required rather potent glasses to read. He didn't like aging one bit, a problem his dear friend would never suffer.

Soun was tall, with a rather regal look about him, blessed with a thick mustache and flowing locks of dark hair, with not a spare ounce of fat upon his frame. It was not intense training and luck that kept him spry and young despite his age, but the simple fortune of being a kami, albeit a very minor one. He was blessed with immortality never aging a day past however old he was. Genma was never privy to that secret as it made Soun blush when he was asked.

"Are you sure your son will make the right wish, Saotome-kun?" They were so close to seeing their plans fulfilled, and if all went well then there would be no problems. With some swinging, the well connected Soun could get his friend an easy pass though the pearly gates and sitting at his side somewhere in Elysium, the infinite gardens of Heaven, where the good of mortal kind and divine being alike were allowed to rest.

Genma just smiled and shook his head to dispel his friend's worries, missing completely the critical piece Soun stole off the board to turn about the losing situation he saw coming. "Don't worry Tendo-kun. The boy can't possibly screw this up. We've run though all the scenarios, it'll go off without a hitch, you'll see. This time next month, we'll be living it up on the River Sparkling Eternity!"

Soun gave a quiet nod, something with irking him, but he couldn't place his finger on it. Seeing that Ranma was going for the phone, he quickly flipped open a device oddly like a very advanced cell phone and pressed a button. After a moment's waiting, he spoke to someone on the other end.

"Are you watching?…Yes, it's almost time. Run the program…Thank you, Nabiki-chan, you don't know how much I appreciate this…ah…yes, dear…I understand, and I promise you, I'll show my gratitude…yes Nabiki-chan…Ah…give my love to Kasumi-chan…" Genma blinked at the sweat drop that formed on his friend's face half way through the talk, wondering just what it was about the middle daughter that caused his friend so much discomfort at times.

"Well, it's all in hand Tendo-kun, now we just sit back and wait. Nothing can ruin this moment, not even _Her_." He smiled, so absorbed in the screen before him that he missed his friend's sudden attack of panic at the slip of the tongue.

"Saotome-kun…you did ask _Her_ permission before you arranged this, didn't you?" Seeing the bald mortal give him a blank stare, as if the thought was beyond him. "Saotome-kun…you didn't…ask…_Her_ permission, did you?"

Now Genma was the one to sweat drop, looking nervous quite suddenly, his elation washing away at the thought of…that woman. "Now, now, Soun. There's no need to panic. I'm sure she'll be perfectly content with this, there's nothing to worry about."

The kami's jaw swung open, and he let out a gasp of shock. The color of his normally tanned skin drained to a sickly pale-white, almost like he'd caught a terrible sickness. He stuttered and shook with sudden fright.

"Saotome-kun! _She_ is…is…a force beyond your worst nightmares when angered. Anything concerning Ranma is Her immediate concern! Without going through proper channels you're just asking for trouble."

He was only more stunned as his friend scoffed. "Ah, Tendo-kun, what can _She_ do that we haven't already prepared for? You're a kami Soun, with three very importantly placed daughters, and a network of powerful friends. You can't possibly think She is that dangerous. We're too insulated from trouble."

The collar of his gi was suddenly pulled forward by desperate hand and his air cut of as he shook like a leaf in a typhoon. "Saotome-kun! _She _is one of the four most powerful forces in Creation! Do you have any idea just who you are married too?! You might not see through the avatar, but Saotome-kun, she is Izanami! The goddess of life and death! She is not a goddess like my daughters. She is a primal force of Creation! She is older than this world! If you make her angry, she has the power to blow us both of existence and chain us to the bowls of Hell! Do you understand now?"

Genma's head continued to bobble as he was shaken too and fro by his friend's desperate show of strength. Somewhere in the haze caused by lack of oxygen, the words fell into place. Snapping his head upright, his fingers dug into the divine silks of Tendo's shirt and almost clung to his friend.

"The others can't stop her?" Now he was sweating, shivering at the prospect of a being powerful enough to make a kami act like a child.

"She was one of the people who designed the Yggdrasil! She sits on the council of Elder Gods, Saotome! Within certain limits she can make the system do whatever she wants! She has every password and program code! Nabiki might be an administrator of incredible skill, such as setting up this demi-plane, or arranging the meeting between our children, but Izanami can make the system do anything, ANYTHING Saotome! She could kill everyone on Earth! She could make every man get pregnant! She could turn every person with blond hair into frogs! Nothing is beyond her power! Why didn't you clear this with her! I told you to ask her!"

Rather than debate the finer points of his domestic situation, Genma let the ultimate panic tactic settle in- running for your life and making sure to cover your behind while doing so, some people liked to call it 'strategic withdraw.' While others settled for 'coward's retreat!'

"We have to stop it, quick, call Nabiki, get her to cancel the program!" He looked to the screen along with his friend, both watching in horror as Ranma finished pushing the final button on the dial-pad. Soun could see the connections forming, the program sequence had already fallen into place, there was nothing to do now.

"We're too late, Saotome. Even Nabiki couldn't stop it now. There's only one thing to do…"

"What's that old friend?" Genma was desperate, any miracle his friend could manage would be beyond beneficial.

"We begin praying with all our hearts your wife is merciful when she kills us for this."

- - - - - 

Akane was furious with the phone, it just refused to ring, one would think that after two days of staring it would obey her will and someone would call. There were six billion people in the mortal realm, certainly one of them qualified for a wish or some other form of help in their problems! If this call took much longer, she was going to explode. Why couldn't Kasumi just come back to work, she seemed to love it so much, who else but the innocent Tendo could stand to watch the line forever.

When she found out whoever was responsible for this assignment, she'd give them a piece of her mind. Along with her fist, foot, elbow, and any thing that remotely serve as a passable club. She'd rather be working as Nabiki's assistant at this moment than sitting before this stupid phone. At least doing routine maintainence on the Yggdrasil would give her something to do.

Wait! She could see feel the program activating, the dimensional connection was slipping into place. She was getting a call! Someone was finally calling, at long last. She took several deep breaths, she needed to be cool on this. This was her big chance to prove her abilities, that she could be cool under pressure. Although, this job didn't exactly come with a lot of stress from the outset.

And unfortunately for her and the would-be recipient of a wish, the hands of two scheming fathers were about to bring chaos on a magnitude they couldn't imagine.

Akane breathed one last time, the final connection sequence was made, and the phone gave a beautiful chime. With a cool feeling, a gloved hand took hold of the receiver and brought it to her ear. It was show time!

And before she could even get out an introduction, her nerves came under fire from some of the heaviest artillery that humanity could provide.

- - - - - 

Ranma could already taste the pizza as his fingers moved across the keys with memorized grace. He'd put in this number so many times over the past he could dial it blind folded and upside down. Like a marine and his rifle, a starving teenager's best friend was the telephone. Ranma was perfectly capable of cooking, he'd inherited the skill from his mother, almost at the genetic level it seemed, however, and while he would never admit it, he was his father's son, cooking was a chore that he was simply too lazy to pursue. When his mother was visiting, it was a different story, he loved to show off his skills for her. It always brought a smile to her lips.

But when it was just the old man and himself, what was the point? Hours of toil with no thanks for the reward, his stomach would be his only supporter in the endeavor. Besides, no time to cook at the moment, he had a manga to get back to. Thus, take out was the most economical way to handle the matter.

When he heard the familiar click of the phone lifting, he didn't even wait for a hello or introduction and simply cut to the chase. "Hi, Mom and Pop's Pizzeria, Thomas-san, this is Saotome Ranma, I'd like our usual order three this time, if you would be so kind. And, could you please throw in a two-liter of soda, arigato. I'll be downstairs in fifteen to pick it up. Bye." And with that taken care of, he went to hang up, but a voice screeched into his ear so loud he had to recoil.

"Wait! You can't hang up! This isn't…who ever you were trying to call. You've reached the G…" hearing a female voice, he just took a stab in the dark who it might be. The Thomas' had a couple girls who helped out with the phones. Ranma knew them from the local high school. One of them had something of a crush on him, and always played little jokes like this.

"Very funny Tani-chan, but I'm hungry and I'd like my pizza soon. If you want a date or something, let's talk about it at school tomorrow, 'kay? Good. Bye now." And again he made to put the phone away.

Akane was quickly getting frustrated, just who was this jerk? One thing about this job she would never understand, here they were the people who maintained all of reality, with a super-computer capable of doing almost anything with the right program, and no one thought to put in caller id? That would really make life so much simpler. A little background on who she was dealing with would go a long way in helping her know if she should have a mallet or a cruise missile ready to deal with the arrogant, morons out there.

"Hold on! You're not listening to me! This is the Goddess Assistance Hotline! You've reached our call center, and I don't want a date with you, you jerk! I'm here to answer you…"

Now Ranma was getting steamed. That Tani was really going overboard with the jokes. She'd been plenty silly in the past, but this was just too far over the top. He was hungry and wanted his pizza, and he had a manga calling! He wasn't about to play some stupid game with the girl.

"Whatever, if my pizza isn't here on time I'm not giving a tip, and you can forget about that date if you're going to be such a snob about it."

"RRRRAAAGGGHHHH!" His ear was nearly blown deaf by the outright roar of feminine rage that shot through the phone line and into his auditory canal. He wondered if the wires were straining from the power in the signal.

"You just stay there you…you moron!" Now she was so mad she couldn't even get out a good come back, just wonderful. He'd never hear the end of it tomorrow, and he didn't even do anything. "I'm coming right over to wipe the floor with you!" Before he could retort the line suddenly went dead.

He frowned and hung up, going back to the living room. Girls, he just didn't get them. Blow up in his face just 'cause he didn't want to play some stupid game. She was the one making the joke in the first place, he wasn't amused and didn't see any reason to play ball. Not his fault she couldn't make herself funny.

Getting so wound up put a strain on his funny bone, so speak, and he decided it might be better to try a little t-v rather than go back to his manga. Didn't want to spoil the humor by being in a foul mood. Right now he really want to punch something, the next best thing would be to watch someone else doing the punching.

His father was a rather cheap individual, and ordered only the barest cable package. It had taken a year of goading to get his old man to expand their choices past the adult channels, which Genma naturally blocked for his own private entertainment. The set and the box that tied it to the outside feed were both primitive things, both of them out of the 80s. His father claimed they held a lot of sentimental value, things he had owned with his wife before Ranma was born.

He was more inclined to believe his father was just a cheap fart who didn't want to spend money on anything new. Even if it was rather cheap to get a reasonably decent television, and upgrading their cable package wouldn't be so hard either. The current one was near the end of its lifespan, and the repairman complained about having to stock antique parts just to fix it when the thing wore down. Genma just hated spending money on anything not related to food or his own personal amusement. If his old man weren't a good martial artist, Ranma would have moved out years ago. His mother had a tendency to be a bit smothering at times, but she knew how to take care of her only child!

He was just leaning forward to turn on the power knob, the thing was that ancient, when something seemed off about the screen. He couldn't put his finger on it, but something was defiantly weird about the smooth glass. It was crackling with more power than normal? Leaning in closer, he gave it a thorough inspection.

Oh, now he saw it. There was a hand coming out of the screen. That was all, nothing serious…wait. Hand, coming out of the screen? Check.

Balling into a fist? Check.

_Whack!_ The next thing Ranma was aware of, he was laid out on the floor, his head spinning from the right cross the television had given him. Did that thing ever have a sweet punch, but this was a house with two strong martial artists, maybe it was to be expected? His jaw defiantly stung from the impact.

With a groan, he sat up slowly, rubbing his sore cheek. He must be hungrier than he thought, if he was envisioning the t.v. actually giving him a blow to the jaw, when he must've tripped over something and smacked into the floor. Or maybe he'd tripped and hit the screen, that might explain it.

Maybe that girl with the pretty hair, wearing the golden-yellow and violet robes could explain it to him. She sure was cute, well if she wasn't' glaring at him like he'd just called her fat or something. His mind now began to spin, the wheels and gears slipping and unable to find traction.

"Who are you?! How did you get in here?!" At least he could put together proper questions without sounding like an idiot, his squawking confusion did enough of that without stuttering.

Her glare hardened and she crossed her arms under her chest, which wasn't very ample he noted with only passing interest. She seemed to notice, and he could swear he saw steam puffing out of her ears. Her red face certainly wasn't a good sign.

When she spoke, it was in a very strained voice, the undercurrent of raw fury would need about a mile to miss being obvious. "I'm Tendo Akane, Goddess Second Class, Hunter Category, Limited License…on temporary…reassignment to the Goddess Relief Agency. You, a royal jerk, have been given the chance for a wish from Heaven. Don't see why, but you have one coming. I'm here to carry it out.

"Don't screw it up, make it a good one and I won't beat you stupider than you are." A sneer thrown out with the barb, which was like a slap in the face, on top of his already stinging jaw. He didn't know how she got in here and blindsided him, but there was no way he was going to let this go.

"I don't know who thinks this is a funny joke, Pops tryin' to pull one over on me I'll bet, but you keep flappin' your tongue like that and I'm going to forget exactly why I don't hit girls." His knuckles were already cracking. This girl had some nerve to come into his house and go punching him, then playing up like she was someone special. He'd heard of drama queens, but drama goddesses? This was just too dumb to be believed. He thought only Kuno was that stupid.

The girl's face got even more screwed up with anger, he took it back she wasn't cute at all. The dress and the hair might be nice, but no one with a temper of a rapid badger would ever be cute in his book. Well, maybe just a little, the way her brown eyes glowed with power, in a way he'd never seen in his life.

"You want to fight, huh? Go right ahead and try it. I might only be limited to Second Class right now, and a lot of my powers sealed while I'm here in mortal form. But I've got enough power in my pinkie to blow you into the next prefecture. Go right ahead and take your best shot!"

That was all the invitation he needed. She thought she was good, huh? Well, he was going to show her who was the best in the east, and it sure wasn't her. Who did she think she was, standing stock still without a care in the world? She must've been a copy cat of his style, that was the only explanation. Time to correct that.

He cocked back his fist and prepared to unload a full power shot, when certain things began to filter through his mind. His father constantly claimed that women were weak, not useful for more than bearing children and working in the kitchen. Maybe this one knew a little about fighting, but it didn't mean he should just launch her from her feet with a punch. That ran through his mind and made him decide to take the edge off his punch, just stun her a little.

Then his mother popped through his head, what would she think if got out that he hit a girl? She'd never forgive him for it, no matter how much of a brute the girl was. His mother made it clear that he would have to learn to talk a girl down, or avoid her if that failed. Putting that thought with his father's chauvinism, he ground to a halt and dropped his guard.

"Ah, ain't worth it. No point screwin' up that uncute face of yours anymore than it already is." He threw the insult so casually it didn't even register in his brain. He just spun about and went for the phone, he needed to call the pizza place again! Hunger and frustrating girls weren't forces he wanted to contend with.

While he was coming for her, Akane had a smug look on her face, waiting for him to try and land a shot. She was a Hunter! Trained by the best to track down and eliminate the most powerful threats to the mortal world. What was some egotistical teenage boy going to do to her? She was a goddess for Pete's sake! Her body might be one hundred percent mortal, but all the power coursing through her veins, she could handle him with one finger.

Her thoughts of smashing ego broke down when he stopped and then just dismissed her. So he suddenly thought he was better than her? Her! A goddess class two? Her fist balled up tight, she was going to lay him out good, that she was here to prove her ability to act calmly on the job had died somewhere between trying "hello" and his first words on the phone.

Then the uncute comment? That was the final straw. With a roar of fury she charged his exposed back, on instinct her power channeled through the muscles in her body, building up for a kinetic release that even ki-enhanced human muscles weren't capable of dealing out. She had him completely off guard, turning to face her in shock. This was perfect!

Time slowed down for Ranma, the girl obviously was a homicidal maniac, given how she was hollering and screaming. What was it they called those crazy European warriors who consumed drugs that made them all hyper and loony, berserker? She would fit that description admirably.

All the power snapping and popping around her really set him on edge, like she was carrying a live wire. Her face was crimson with fury and the veins in her forehead looked ready to pop. It was all he could to throw up a sloppy guard, arms crossing in front of his chest. Her fist cocked back and unloaded a pointblank shot into his crossed forearms.

The divine power behind her blow shot right through his body and swept him off his feet. Ranma shouted in terror as he was thrown backward into the wall of the next room, left to sag against the floor, his vision blurry, spots of light dancing around before his eyes. Somehow nothing was broken, and he sported no bruises, but boy did he ache!

Akane was smug, huffing at her work, pride overflowing. She marched up to him, arms akimbo, and looking very much like a strutting peacock. Her robes floated behind her, a mixture of sunset colors that made her look ethereal and stunning. The boy's eyes took in the sight of her, with his dazed senses, and almost gasped. She really did look a goddess in that moment, glowing with power, and having proved it first hand to a man who should be worshiping her.

"Well, are you going to apologize? Or do I really have to get rough?" She was in superior form to negotiate now. Now this was how someone was supposed to get respect, and go about her divine duties. Cowing the mortal a little to let him know just where he stood on the food chain. Her whole point of existing was to help jerks like him get a better shake in life, he aught to recognize the importance of her position and start kowtowing. Kami had shrines all over the world, maybe she should get in the business of being worshiped, she kind of liked it.

Ranma was stunned beyond words for a minute, then opened his mouth and muttered slightly. "Woah...wish you'd show me how to do that..." and there it was, the inaudible but heartfelt wish she'd come to grant.

His words might have been croaked, but by her divine nature she picked up on them where mortals might not. She stopped short and her aura of power broke, the spell going away in an instant. That was a little too easy, and not exactly the kind of wish she wanted to hear. Well, as long as the system didn't...

The triangular markings on her forehead, ignored by both parties till now, began to glow. She felt the pulse of the Yggdrasil work in her blood, opening the channels in the main portions of it program and networking with the central database. Think of it as divine email. A bolt of light shot out of her forehead and lanced straight up into the sky, burning a hole in the roof as it went. People seeing the phenomena were convinced some for of experimental death ray was being testing by a foreign power, maybe this was that 'Star Wars advanced missile defense' thing those Americans were always talking about? Backup programs would kick in and make everyone dismiss it as an airport spot light within minutes.

Akane floated off the ground for a few seconds as he body was hijacked by the system as a land line to the main processor. The information exchange was relatively quick, not ten seconds in length, but it was no less awe inspiring to a stunned Ranma, who was not used to seeing divine connections opening up in his house.

The beam cut off and the goddess settled back to the ground, a little dazed from the transfer. She couldn't believe it, that wish had been acceptable? Well, no help for it now, so long as someone else could meet the requirements.

There was a stunned silence, which turned into a round of stunned awe, this time from Akane, as the information she had 'beamed' up to Heaven was processed and triggered a hibernating program, stored under the information concerning one Saotome Ranma. The program came to life of its own accord, shocking Nabiki and her assistance team in the control center for the main core, there was nothing they could do. The system locked them out before they could respond.

Another beam of light shook the Saotome house, this one coming down. Think of it as Heaven's reply mail. The ray exploded through the body and took him off his own feet. He hovered there for a few seconds, bathed in the radiance, feeling warm and energized. His own Heaven script appeared on his head, the dark portion of the yin-yang burning into his forehead. The beam cut out and he floated to the ground, feeling extremely queasy.

He looked up when he heard Akane's gasp, she was looking at him like he'd grown a second head or something. They stared at one another for long seconds, both uttering the same thought at the same instant.

"What just happened?"

- - - - - 

**Final Comments:**

Well, there you have it, the opening chapter for this exploratory idea I had after finishing the Ah! My Goddess anime. I've juggled things up to make it fit, and at the moment it's highly unlikely that anyone from that series will show up, maybe save a few minor characters, or Kami-sama himself. I haven't yet decided. The main Ranma crew will all show up in due time, slightly altered to fit the story, but hopefully they will all mostly be in character.

As a note on the goddess license thing; as I understand it, Class is the only important thing dealing with power. First class being the most powerful and duty bound, and so forth below them. The category license just means what they do in Heaven. In the series, Category One seems to be doing administrative duty for the Yggdrasil, and Category Two seems to be everything else. Since that is rather vague, I'm going to give them specific jobs related to their license. Oh yes, the Unlimited/Limited attachment just means how much leeway a goddess has in what she can do concerning her a job.

As a Second Class, Hunter, Limited; Akane is constantly being watched by her superiors, and they won't be as kind in allowing her to make snap decisions in her work. I don't know yet, but I think all the Tendo sisters will be Class One ;) 'Kane is just on probation for a botched job with a little too much collateral damage caused.

And yes, Nodoka will be an extremely powerful being, but she will not be doing Hild's job in this one. As per my understanding of Shinto-Buddhism, there are kami that do good things, and kami that do bad things. Look up legends of Sano-o and you'll see what I mean, he was a very naughty guy who played a lot of mean tricks on people, but he was still a god of Japan. "Bad" kami will have their place in the universe, as will be explained later. They aren't exactly evil, they just tend to cause of lot of misfortune. Without trying to remake the planet.

The 'demons' of this story will be creatures that are very evil, and want to bring as much suffering and destruction as possible to the planet. Hence, there are powerful gods and goddesses who hunt down demons that pop up and cause a lot of trouble.

Reviews and questions are welcome, and I hope you guys like this little experiment.

Till next time,

Dorin!


End file.
